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Child custody and the holidays may spark conflict post divorce

The emotional effects of divorce can easily persist long after the divorce has been finalized. This is especially true when the holidays roll around, and it is particularly the case for the parents of young children in New York. However, a few tips may help those dealing with the complexities of child custody and the holidays during a divorce proceeding.

Ideally, the children of divorce will be able to see both parents during the holidays. However, this is not always possible. Therefore, it is wise for both parents to come up with a parenting agreement, if possible, that includes specifics regarding the holidays. Having these specifics in writing helps to avoid chaos and confusion during the holidays, and it also makes it easier for the parents to keep the children out of the middle of the situation.

Also, being flexible during the holidays is critical. Sometimes, it simply makes sense for the children to stay with just one parent during a particular holiday. For instance, perhaps the maternal grandparents are arriving in town for Thanksgiving for the first time in a few years. In this situation, the children may want to spend Thanksgiving with the maternal grandparents and then spend Christmas with their father's side of the family.

Creating a mutually beneficial parenting agreement during informal negotiations or divorce mediation is generally a helpful move for dealing with a wide variety of child custody and visitation issues following divorce. Of course, sometimes, two divorcing spouses cannot see eye to eye on these issues, in which case they have no choice but to go to divorce trial. Either way, an attorney in New York can provide a divorcing parent with the guidance that he or she needs to pursue the most personally favorable outcomes while most importantly considering what is in the children's best interests.

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