Not unlike the marriages that preceded them, divorces in which parents attempt to co-parent will not have a one-sized-fits-all template.
Some divorced parents choose to limit their interactions with each other. An alternative known as co-parenting encourages parents to interact and work together, perhaps even without court involvement, to act in the best interests of the child.
Success requires examining the pros and cons
Children can benefit from co-parenting because it creates a structured schedule and a sense of routine.
Some parents take this farther by using a practice known as “bird nesting.” In these cases, the child stays in one home while the parents rotate between this home and their separate home.
Co-parenting requires discipline for both parents. They must set aside negative feelings toward the other, or at least learn to control them.
If the do not, children can become distant or withdraw from one parent.
Tips that parents that incorporate into their co-parenting arrangement include:
- Flexible routine: Establish a calendar and set times to stay together.
- Open communication: Create a plan to communicate individually and with the children.
- Set boundaries: How much do you want/should you ex know about your personal life?
- No negative talk in front of children: Feelings about an ex should not affect the children’s relationship with the other.
Moving out of state
The ability to employ co-parenting depends on numerous factors. A most obvious one, geographic proximity, can reduce its effectiveness or even eliminate it from consideration altogether.
According to North American Moving Services, New Yorkers are among the most likely individuals to choose to move another state. While 41% of individuals moved inbound, 59% moved outbound.
When faced with separation and divorce, the best option requires consideration of all parties. Relationships among children and parents and parents themselves may appear straightforward. Circumstances may change, and an attorney who understands child custody can offer guidance.