When you and your co-parent were determining custody arrangements for holidays, you may have been focused on Christmas, Thanksgiving and spring break. Now that Halloween is coming up and your child is getting excited about it, you may realize that the two of you need to work out how you can each find a way to share it with them.
If you haven’t yet negotiated your custody agreement, now is a good time to determine what works for Halloween – particularly if your child is young enough to need parental involvement in their plans for another year or more.
Halloween is more than one day
The important thing to remember is that there’s no “right” way to co-parent through Halloween. It’s not just one day (or night). You can both share Halloween traditions with your child, like picking out pumpkins, visiting corn mazes, braving a haunted house attraction, decorating, jack-o’-lantern carving and watching classic Halloween movies throughout the month.
If your child has any school or other Halloween parties on their schedule where parents are invited, you and your co-parent can each plan to attend one or more. That includes any work Halloween parties where children are invited.
Who takes their child trick-or-treating on Halloween night can be a source of conflict. If both you and your co-parent feel strongly about doing it, you have several options (assuming you live reasonably close to each other).
You can divide up the evening and each take them in your own neighborhood, with your child staying over with whichever parent has custody that night. Going out together as a family can work if you and your co-parent can do it without conflict. You may choose to take another child’s parent up on their offer to take your child.
How to let your child weigh in without making them choose
If your child is old enough to have an opinion, listen to what they have to say. Just don’t make them feel like they have to choose between their parents. After getting their input, make sure they know the decision is yours and your co-parent’s and that your primary focus is on them enjoying the holiday.
If you’re ready to codify Halloween in your custody agreement or you need some help resolving custody issues around this and the other upcoming holidays, getting legal guidance can help.
